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I have been wanting to write to all of you from my heart to yours and share a bit as I reflect back on the year.

First, I hope you were inspired by all the Ways to Gift Joy with Syd that we’ve been sharing! Have you seen the new design from it? OMG how much do you love it? Btw, we’ve put together a recap of all the ways to gift joy. Click here to see it.

As I write this from Vermont, with my fresh cacao, the fire roaring, and these graphics of Syd surrounding me for inspiration, I am filled with such joy and peace. But that wasn’t the case for most of the year.

I have gone through yet another metaphorical death and rebirth. No surprise there as I have 5 planets in my 8th house. OK there I go with Astrology again.

So last spring, sadly, my brother passed away after a long illness, and before I was done processing it all, I had to dive into a huge trade show that I’d already committed to earlier in the year. Meditating on the floor of the booth saved me.

This fall when I took off to Japan, the war broke out a few days after landing. Even with mixed emotions, I did my best to send the peaceful vibe of Japan out. I meditated every day in a different area of Japan and sent prayers from all the shrines and gardens. Then, after such a big trip (in so many ways), I came home sick which forced me to rest and meditate for three weeks to recover.

Finally into the holidays – our busiest time of year – it was time to part ways with the fulfillment center who ships Syd. You should see my house which is where all orders are currently shipping from…

I now see it all, especially those 3 weeks of getting over being sick, as a blessing (if you had asked me then.. not so much). I was so tired. I was burnt out and felt like I was back in corporate with thoughts like: Why had I quit if I was going to go back to that same feeling? Where is my joy? I feel like a fraud.

I did so much meditating and writing and all the things. I knew I would never stop TSM, but something had to change.

I don’t know when exactly it happened, but I now see why my house had to become a fulfillment center at this time… I can bless and wrap each order with the energy I want, I can create limited edition products that would have been way too complicated and costly to run through the fulfillment center (at least being the small business I am).

When I look at Syd in these new graphics, something is coming alive again more than ever:

Please know that I never lost sight of what a privileged blessed life I have, but I feel a purpose of mine is to spread joy, so when I lose touch with that, I make it my mission to find my way back there. But like in my early days when I quit corporate, I couldn’t figure it out with my mind this time. Nope, I had to surrender to something bigger than myself which is what I did starting with those 3 weeks of stillness.

Little by little, my huge joy has come back and the Universe is showing me something I never saw coming. Yes, my person Bill always saw it, and I can now say I think he was right. This past week has been wild with signs as to where Syd is taking me.

So while I will never like the death part of a death and rebirth time, I can see so clearly why it is so necessary. And it feels so good to be on the other side.

I love Syd so much. He is really magical. I love being able to share him with all of you that connect to his light.

With love and magic,
Ellen and Syd


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